Wednesday, 27 July 2011

I Am Hungry NOW!


Dear Mom,

I like playing our games so much that I thought I'd start a new round.  You've been getting so complacent lately, thinking that just because I usually wake up for my bottle between 4-4:30am that I would always do so.  Nah.  Last night, I thought 1:45 would be a fabulous time.  It was ever so nice when you hopped out of bed, told Daddy to go back to sleep and took me downstairs to get my bottle ready.  I thought I'd try my charm first with a few giggles and grins while you changed my nappy but just when my bottle was nearly - but not quite - ready, it was time to ROAR.  I was hungry NOW.

But of course, you work quickly having become accustomed to my mid-night roars and I had the bottle in my mouth inside 2 minutes flat.  Hmmm.  Foiled.  And this really is very nice milk....

Adam, Nil.  Mummy, 1.

Well, I thought I'd drink just enough of my milk to have you believe it would be a nice quiet night.  So I drank nicely until 2:20am.  There were only 30ml's left so I had to move quickly if I wanted to have any fun.  I started to wiggle.  I scrubbed my head with my scratch mitts and I pushed the bottle out of my mouth.  I rolled my head backwards and forwards so it was in your armpit one second and looking over the other side of the room the next second.  Heaven forbid if you didn't move the bottle quickly enough to keep up!  You tried to wind me, tried to pat my back, tried to move my arm out of the way, tried to reposition my head so I would be comfortable.  Nah...I was just having fun Mum!  This is the sort of fun that can go on and on...for half an hour.  It was now 2:50am.  Such fun!

Adam, 1.  Mummy, 1.

Finally, I couldn't hold out any longer.  My bottle was nearly finished and your arms were just so comfortable that I had to have a little snooze.  Of course you thought that meant I was ready to go back to bed and even hoped you might get some sleep too.  Nah.  I was just resting my eyes Mum!  

Oh no, you're not even thinking of putting me back in my bed are you Mum?  Yes of course I was snoring, that just adds to the effect!  The moment my head was gently lowered onto my pillow...ROAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Adam, 2.  Mummy, 1.

You tried so hard Mum but I wasn't having it.  I wiggled.  I bounced my legs up and down so I was nearly doing somersaults by bending at the waist and lifting my legs all the way up and out of my basket.  I rolled from side to side.  I roared.  I screeched.  I spit my dumbles out just as many times as you put it back in again.  You even tried offering me the rest of my milk while I was lying in my bed.  Silly Mummy!  As if what I wanted was milk!  What I wanted was attention.  I was having fun!

Unfortunately, you decided to stop playing.  I couldn't believe it when you put my dumbles in and actually WALKED OUT OF THE ROOM!  How DARE you!!  Oh I roared.  Mother, if you thought I was going to take that one lying down....well to be fair, I can't sit up so I guess I had to take it lying down, but I WASN'T going to do so quietly!  Unfortunately, you ignored me and kept doing the dishes.  Oh from time to time you came in to reinsert my dumbles but however much I roared, wiggled and rolled, you were determined not to play.

Hmph.  I suppose I might as well go to sleep.  It is 3:22am after all, so I have kept you up for quite some time...and this bed really is rather comfortable...and I don't think I can resist the dim lights and tasty dumbles...sucksucksucksnoooooorrrreeee.......

Adam, 2. Mummy, 2.

Well now.  You didn't think I was going to let you have a lie in did you?  6:15 is a lovely time of day to wake up isn't it Mummy?  It's so lovely that I had to have a giggle in my basket.  You look a bit bleary eyed Mum.  How come?  Don't you want to play?  I'm up Mum and it's a BEEEOOOOTIFUL day!  Come play with me Mum!

Adam, 3.  Mummy, 2.

Now then Mum.  You rather hoped I'd have some nice long naps today didn't you?  You had so many things you wanted to do today, from cleaning some trains to sell, all the way to painting a wall.  Silly Mummy, as if I was going to let you do those things!  Of course I would have my bottle and then get very sleepy and even let out a few snores but I was just resting Mum.  Heaven forbid you should dare to put me back in my bed and be so presumptuous as to actually open the tin of paint and dip your paintbrush in.  That strikes me as the perfect time to say, "HI MUM!  WHATCHOO DOIN'???"

Mum, why are you sighing?  

Adam, 4.  Mummy, 2.

Mum you have such a way with rocking my basket.  It's so gentle and nice.  Soothing really.  And it's such a nice dumbles.  Hey Mum, have I told you I've learned a new trick?  I know how to remove my dumbles now.  You see, I just curl my fist over it, carefully work my fingers behind it and "pop!" Out it comes.  The problem is that I haven't yet worked out how to put it back in again so I have to shout:  "Mum!  MUM! I've LOST my DUMBLES!  This cannot BE!  MUUUMMMM!!!!"

"It's right here in your hand dear.  Here you go..."  (Reinsert)

2 minutes later.

"Mum!  MUM! I've LOST my DUMBLES!  This cannot BE!  MUUUMMMM!!!!"

"It's still right here in your hand dear.  If you'd stop removing it then you wouldn't think you'd lost it."  (Reinsert)

But Muuummmmm.  It's so much fun to play with my dumbles.  The only problem is....  "Mum!  MUM! I've LOST my DUMBLES!  This cannot BE!  MUUUMMMM!!!!"

Mum, why are you still sighing?  Hey, at least I let you get one brushful of paint on the wall this time.  Why are you complaining?  You've painted.  Oooohhhh.  You mean you actually wanted to finish the wall?  Silly Mummy.

"Mum!  MUM! I've LOST my DUMBLES!  This cannot BE!  MUUUMMMM!!!!"

Adam, 5.  Mummy....oh I give up.  

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