Wednesday, 20 July 2011

I. WANT. MY. MILK. NOW!!

Now Mummy, you didn't honestly think you'd gotten off quite that lightly did you?  Just one night and a gently quiet easing into your morning?  (And while I'm on the subject Mom, you really should drink less coffee.  That stuff just isn't good for you.)  Anyway, that was just the beginning of my nefarious plot.  Yes, nefarious.  I do like that word.  Actually, I think I might be a bit of a child prodigy but I digress...where was I?  Oh yes...

I finally woke up at 9am, with a lovely big yawn and a long luxurious stretch.  Ahh the wonders of a nice long sleep.  It does help one start the day out right.  Now then, Mother.  Where. Is. My. Milk?  I require my milk...AT ONCE!!!!  No, I DON'T want you to change my nappy.  No I DON'T want a bath.  No, I DON'T want to get dressed.  You are NOT moving quickly enough.  I DON'T want to wait four minutes for it to warm up.  I.  WANT.  MY.  MILK.  NOW!!!

Mother, why are you looking for earplugs?  I'm not that noisy am I?  (Sweetly batting eyelashes)  You love me really.

Adam, 1.  Mummy Nil.

You know Mum, I quite like screaming.  It's rather fun.  I thought I would scream for my milk, then scream because I had wind, then scream for my dumbles, then scream because I was tired, then scream because I was awake, then scream because I wanted my nappy changed, then scream because I was lonely and wanted a cuddle.  Muuuummmmm....why do you look stressed?

Adam, 2.  Mummy Nil.

Hmmm.  Mummy you really do give nice cuddles.  I know I like screaming but I'm just so comfy...snore.....

Adam, 2, Mummy, 1. 

I decided this was just perfect.  I know Mummy thought I was sleeping, but I had one eye open really.  You see, I kept snoring just long enough to let her put me in my basket, to stroke my head gently and smile because I looked SO cute.  Then she yawned, grabbed a cushion and duvet and crawled onto the settee.  Of course there was no reason why she shouldn't have a nap as I was asleep and safe in my basket.  But I couldn't possibly let her rest could I?  When she could be awake and looking after me?  I'll just give her enough time to properly relax...I think ten minutes or so should do.  Just enough time for her to think she was going to have a niiiiccce nap.

Ahem.

Testing.  1,2,3.  Testing.

SCREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ahhh, it's just so much fun to watch Mummy jump a foot into the air.

Mischief managed... 

Adam, 3.  Mummy 1.

(Some hours later...)  Ahh Mummy, it's been a lovely day.  I've had so much fun.  I'm a little hoarse now but I'm sure an hour's snooze will sort that out ready for our next match.  Mummy, why are you handing me over to Daddy?  You're not tired of playing with me are you?  Ahh Mummy, you're such a spoilsport...I was having fun.  Mummy, where are you going?  Is it nice walking outside?  Can I come with you?  Mummy?  Hrmph.  She's not listening to me.  That's not fair. 

Adam, 3, Mummy, 2.

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